The crisis of three years – features, manifestations, advice to parents
Age crises are an inevitable stage of development and maturation of the child. This is a kind of turning points, during which there is a reappraisal of all previous values, a rethinking of one’s self and relationships with others. One of such moments is the crisis of 3 years.
The crisis of three years – especially
Each period of child development has its own needs, ways of interaction, behavior patterns and self-awareness. Having reached the age of three, the baby begins to realize that he is a person. Scarce understands that he is the same as other people. This is manifested by the appearance of the word “I” in speech. If a child had no problems talking about himself in the third person, calling himself by name, for example, he said: “Sasha wants to eat,” now it happens less and less. Now, when looking at his reflection in a mirror or photo, he says with confidence: “This is me.” The crumb begins to perceive himself as an independent person with his own characteristics and desires. With this awareness comes the crisis of three years. The once sweet cute baby at this time can greatly change and turn into a stubborn and capricious “nehochuhu.”
The crisis of 3 years in a child – the main signs
Awareness of the “I” at the crumbs begins under the influence of, with every day increasing, practical activity. That is why at this age from it one can more often hear “I myself”. During this period, the child is driven not only by the desire to learn more and to master something new, now the world around him becomes a sphere of self-realization, where he tests his strength and experiences the possibilities. By the way, this is the moment when a child develops pride, which is one of the greatest incentives for self-improvement.
A new awareness of his personality is also manifested in the desire to imitate adults and to be like them in everything. A kid, wanting to prove his equality with seniors, can try to do the same thing as they do – combing their hair, putting on shoes, dressing, etc., and also behaving like elders, defending their opinions and desires. In addition, there is a restructuring of the social position, the attitude is changing not only towards oneself, but also towards close and even strangers. The main motives of the actions of the crumbs are increasingly dependent not on instantaneous desire, but on the manifestation of personality and relationships with others.
This often leads to new lines of behavior that are signs of a three-year crisis. These include:
Stubbornness. Having expressed any desire or thought, the baby will stand on his own to the last, and even if this very desire has disappeared long ago. Usually persuasion and persuasion will not help any persuasion and promise of something more worthwhile. Thus, the crumb wants to understand what his opinion is considered.
Negativism. This term means the child’s desire to contradict and do everything differently as he is told. For example, a crumb can really want to go for a walk or draw, but refuse it only because the offer came from an adult. But such behavior is not at all indulgence or disobedience. Thus, the child does not do it at all because of this, he wants it – this is how he tries to protect his “I”.
The desire for independence. The child seeks to do everything and decide only himself. At first glance, this is not bad, but age crises in children at the age of three make this feature excessive and inadequate to their capabilities. Therefore, such independence is more correctly called self-will.
Depreciation. Anything that once was dear or interesting for a child can lose all meaning for him. Moreover, it concerns not only things or favorite activities, the behavior and even the attitude towards relatives can change. During this period, parents for a baby can “become evil”, a nice neighbor, whom he had previously happily met — nasty, his favorite soft toy is a bad one, etc. Often, children begin to call names or swear.
Despotism The child tells others what they should do or how they should behave and demands that they obey him. For example, a crumb decides who should leave and who will stay, what he will wear, eat or do.
3 years crisis – how to behave with a child
Changes in the behavior of the child, and sometimes very large, often cause bewilderment among fathers and mothers. It is very important not to respond to them harshly, constantly punishing the crumbs. In such a situation it is necessary to understand that this is the normal development of a child at the age of 3 years. Age crises affect all mentally healthy children, only sometimes they flow almost imperceptibly, and sometimes, on the contrary, they last for a very long time and go through hard, delivering a lot of suffering to the baby. During this period, the main task of the parents is to support their baby and help him overcome it as painlessly as possible.
Give your child the freedom to choose
Children in three years expect from others, and especially from parents recognition of their independence and independence, even despite the fact that they themselves are not yet ready for this.